I think someone put too much Yang in my smoothie. Or maybe it’s Yin… I can never remember which is which.
Anyway I have way too much of the crazy untethered in the stratosphere floating through electric fields kind. And while having a lot of energy is a nice change–I certainly don’t want to go back to that numbed world I was living in just 5 weeks ago–what I am experiencing is unnerving and does NOT feel balanced.
Every other day I don’t go to bed. I almost never want to eat–I’m just not hungry. When I do eat anything other than fresh succulent fruit; I regret it and wish I had fruit. It’s like there is nothing in my stomach to “buffer” anything more substantial than fruit and it’s juiciness.
My nut consumption is going way down. I don’t want salads or cabbage. And when I do try to make a new gourmet raw food recipe I’m usually disappointed. Why? What happened to all the fun I was having in the kitchen? I’ve always enjoyed traditional cooking, and was getting off on experimenting w/ raw menu items.
Let me be real about where I’m at after this past week experiencing truly manic levels of unfocused energy. I can’t wait for this 60 days I committed to to be over! I want lentils. I want potatoes. I want some grounding ,requires digestion, so you can rest medicine.
Maybe 100% raw is just TOO much?
TO be fair I want to quickly point out two semi-related issues that I know are contributing to the insomnia and my feeling off-kilter…
1. I started blogging & tweeting at exactly the same time I started my 60 day raw “challenge.” I thought it would be cool to share the experience with anyone interested. I didn’t know I would be throwing myself into a new universe whose steep learning curve and addictive nature are it’s price of entry. I also didn’t know that it would be a place with large stretches of haunting emptiness and occasional noxious gas clouds back lit by glaring red stars…
2. I need a more intense physical outlet. Now that I’m lighter and feel so much better I’m doing myself a huge disservice by not rigorously exercising every day.
Deepak Chopra (Who I don’t follow on Twitter because he tweets way too much) has this thing he talks about which has stuck with me for years…it goes something like this…
DYNAMIC ACTIVITY = DEEP REST
DEEP REST = DYNAMIC ACTIVITY
That’s something I am sorely missing. So understand I’m not blaming this on raw foods, but for me right now it’s all related. I thought riding my bike more, taking a hike on the weekend, and occasionally dropping and doing some push-ups would cover it. It’s not enough for my fruit filled dragster body.
So here’s my plan to try and be in possession of my sanity and other faculties at the end of the next 3 weeks:
1. More Greens & Water. You will read this in almost every raw food context you can find, and I think I can do better with both…
2. Set a cut off time for Twitter and Blogging. Like no Twitter or blogs after midnight. I need to pop in a DVD and be entertained or read one of the countless books piled high in my “READ!” stack.
3. Breathe! Seriously how often do we forget to breathe? I can get so hooked into cyberspace that I forget to drink water and I’ll sit there bouncing around in my chair because I need to piss so bad! That’s also why I’m taking advantage of this gorgeous Palm Springs day and blogging outside by the pool…
4. Start back to Bikram Yoga. It’s been almost two years. It’s time. Not only is this the “dynamic activity” I’m missing in my life–it also will really help me with #3–BIG BREATHS!
That said, I’m still looking forward to reintegrating some healthy cooked foods (sorry hard-core raw foodists, I know you think “healthy cooked food” is an oxymoron) back into my life.