Fat Kid Suit


Leave a comment

Santa’s either on raw foods or crack…

Sorry to break with tradition kids, but Santa comes earlier and earlier every year (that’s what happens when you get old), and I opened my presents already!

Here’s what she got me. Oh yeah, I forgot, Santa’s a she:

Black & Decker Power Pro Wide Mouth Food Processor

This thing is the bomb.

I did creamy pesto (combined my raw mayo which is cashews and olive oil and lemon and vinegar with loads of fresh basil, some rawmesan, and more oil) in it last night already.

You’ve probably heard me bitch about how hard raw food prep is with only a blender.  Blenders ARE NOT food processors.  The way all your stuff keeps getting stuck in the bottom…maddening.

This babies not only got a wide mouth–she’s also got a big ol bottom.  And it has other cool attachments like graters and flour mixers and all that.  Plus because it’s a Black & Decker I feel like a real man when I use it.

I AM STOKED!

Spatula Spoon Things

A 3 pack of really cool spatulas that are each shaped differently and that also act as squeegees for scraping all that good pesto outta the food processor.

These things are brilliant!

It feels super crummy to waste food stuck on the side of a blender…get these!

More Counter Space

We have no damn counter space!  I love to cook (or for the past few months “prep”) food and it is so frustrating to never have space to work.  So Santa, or Annie, let’s just call her Sannie; remembered the trick we did in our minuscule NYC apartments and got me a honking huge cutting board that fits perfectly over half the stove top.

Instant counter top extension.  Now I can stack supplies there and cut and prep next to it on one of my smaller cutting boards!

Shooting Ear Muffs

With a name like Putin, you wear them however you like. Hear he makes a mean smoothie too.

You don’t actually shoot ear muffs, you wear them.  And even though we don’t own a gun, we do look like FBI agents now whenever we blend.  The ones I got for Christmas are genuine “Winchester” ear muffs.

Don’t laugh.  Our blender is LOUD LOUD.  And it’s going all the time.

I get home from the bar and I’m making smoothies sometimes at 2AM.

Then when I’m trying to sleep at 6AM it sounds like SAW IV when Sannie’s in the kitchen making her huge green cacoa concoction before yoga. I finally get up around noon I’m back at the blender making my “I Am What I Am” drink.

So we now wear gun protection when we blend.  And my ears are thanking me already.  Plus it’s fun to put them on and talk.  You can’t really hear yourself.

Off to the SF Bay area soon for a chilly Christmas week.  Can’t wait to hit up Cafe Gratitude for some raw gourmet…

The Inside of the Berkeley Cafe Grat Location

And my eight weeks of being 100% raw will be over…so I’m also looking forward to eating at our favorite family owned Mexican restaurant in Concord–Las Montanas!

Bring on the beans n rice, handmade corn tortillas, grilled onions n peppers, and salsa roja!

What will I being eating after my 60 days raw challenge is over?

I have some cool ideas about that and will share them shortly!

Advertisements


3 Comments

Laugh your ass off while using two basic raw food kitchen tools…the ubiquitous Vitamix & a “spiralizer.”

As the effects of eating raw are changing how I look and act (I’m one happy hyper dude lately), more people are asking me about what I’m doing and how it all works.

The “what the hell do you EAT?” question is harder to answer than you might think. At least the first few times someone asks…

I try and answer by focusing on BASICS that anyone can do, whether they are a diabetic who is considering going 100% raw Dr. Gabriel Cousens style, or just someone that wants to replace some of their meals with raw nutritious foods.

All Hail The Vitamix

To me, SMOOTHIES are the most basic thing anyone who wants to eat more raw fruits, seeds, and vegetables (especially GREENS) can do.  Check out my Naked Smoothies page for dessert level raw “shakes” that are a great way for someone to transition over to raw…

What’s the single best tool for doing smoothies, green drinks, etc.?  The Vitamix.

That's why I don't have kids..

Sadly, I do not own one.  I am a broke ass right now and am making due with an eager but under powered (gasp) blender.  The blender and I have an abusive relationship, but we manage.

If you’ve got the money, do not pass go before buying yourself the Cadillac of “blenders”; which also acts as a juicer, dry flour grinder, nut butterer, and even ice cream maker!

Dare you to call it a blender!

I am very familiar with the Vitamix because I use them all the time.  Where?  EVERY bar/restaurant I’ve ever worked in has one.  The main reason being they can crush ice better than a gristle ice trucker, and they are REALLY REALLY reliable.  So, a Vitamix is an investment level appliance we’re talking about here people!

I start my day with a nice stiff (get your naughty minds out of the gutter…) green drink.  Here’s my favorite one right now…

“I am what I am” morning drink

Did you know canned spinach looks like that?

  • Juice 2 sweet grapefruits by hand (I also don’t own a juicer).
  • Pretty much fill the blender up with spinach.
  • Blend.
  • Drink down the crazy.

Now if I had a Vitamix, I’d probably juice one of the grapefruits, and put the other one in peeled.  The Vitamix can pulverize whole fruit (and the seeds) down to “juice.”  That has a bunch of advantages..

  1. It’s WAY easier than juicing (which is a chore and a half).
  2. Less waste (why throw the grapefruits fleshy wonders in the compost?)
  3. More fiber…especially important for people with insulin issues.

Also, my blender can handle spinach, but it hates kale, beets and other hard core veggies.  The Vitamix and a good recipe can turn those ruffians into something you’ll actually WANT to drink.  When you start buying mostly raw food this is a huge advantage because a lot of the stuff you buy (beets/carrots/etc.) have greens ATTACHED to them.  They are like BONUS greens IF you have a way to make them appetizing…

Bonus Greens

My New Favorite Toy

shame shame

Wow! You all need to stop looking at so much porn!  I’m talking about my Spiralizer…

What’s a spiralizer?  It’s this little magic slicer dicer that turns zucchini and other unmentionables into PASTA!  I love this tool.  Think about it…once you have the canvas (zucchini noodles)…you are ready to enter into a realm of Bohemian enticements (raw sauces!).

And unlike Vitamix’s and Excalibur Food Dehydrators this little spiralizer is cheap!  Top the veggie noodles with my “meaty sauce” or some fresh walnut pesto and you are asking for savory overload.

MEATY sauce

Ignore the bread

  • soak 12 sun dried tomatoes (real ones-not from a jar or in oil) and10 sun dried olives in hot tap water (set aside)
  • roughly dice up 1 large fresh tomato, 1 large red pepper, 1 stalk of celery, and 1 clove of garlic.
  • Put all the diced items in a blender/processor/or Vitamix
  • Add a tbs or some really good cold-processed olive oil, a small handful of fresh basil leaves, and sea salt IF the tomatoes or olives aren’t salted already.
  • Blend just until mixed.
  • Now…drain the warm water from the sun dried ingredients and add them to the blender.

    ironic farm animal plates not included

  • Blend to the consistency you like.  This last step is going to make the sauce really rich and “meaty.”  The sauce is also going to be nice and WARM–a real treat for people who eat 100% raw!
  • Pour or Ladel over your awesome zucchini noodles!
  • Top with Rawmesan to get really old school!

You can buy both of these kitchen equipment items and other “Raw Kitchen Essentials” from the beautiful Kristen Suzanne (click the link and scroll down) or do a quick Google/eBay search for deals.  I just did a quick search on the spiralizer I use (Saladacco Metro) and found a bunch of them on sale here.

I don’t make any money off these links.  So order a second Vitamix for me!  Or at least share your sauce and smoothie recipes with me…

Cheers!


7 Comments

60 day raw food log: day 28 If raw food is so great, why do I feel bad?

It’s Sunday in Palm Springs, 75 degrees out, beautiful mountain backdrop, happy friendly people and their pets are out enjoying the life…

And I feel like shit.

Why?

My first week eating only raw food was rough.  Imagine cutting yourself off cold-turkey from drinking over 100 adult beverages per week, abstaining from your morning cup of crack with the pretty mermaid on it, and suddenly refusing your body any access to pizzas and Mexican food…NOT a fun transition.

If you’ve seen New Moon, and watched Kristen Stewart’s “Bella” writhe and scream in her sleep over her lost Edward (who I still maintain looks an awful lot like Bert from Sesame Street), you have an inkling of what my first week raw felt like!

Weeks two and three were a different movie…I felt euphoric and “high” and ate up all the positive comments I was getting from friends and strangers.  EVERY SINGLE DAY I saw a thinner, sexier, happier, healthier, more in-tune version of me in the full-length mirror.

Having a cute young raw foods chef at a Santa Monica cafe ask me if I was “raw” the second I walked in the door surprised me.  When I answered yes, and she told me she “thought so, because my eyes were so clear and I really had a case of the glow” I was beyond flattered.

But here I am near the end of week four, a week of apathy and fatigue.  What’s up?  I feel like I’m doing this right…I’ve slowly been upping my intake of greens, I’m making sure I get natural fats like hemp oil, I’m still eating a lot of juicy organic fruits…

Also, I eat very little dehydrated raw foods (they make me feel as dry as they are) and most days just eat foods in their whole simple form without trying to “doll” them up.

I’m hoping that it’s just another cleansing level I’ve hit?  I would expect my recent toxic past to haunt me for awhile. Maybe it’s a little bit mental…one month is the longest I’ve ever gone before raw…? But Jesus do I hate the idea that some or all of the benefits of raw eating might just be in my head.

One interesting distinction I’d like to make: I’m not depressed.  I’ve spent much of my life in moderate to severely depressed states, this isn’t anything like that.  I’m clear about things–almost scary sober–but I don’t necessarily like how that feels…

Sometimes eating raw makes so much sense to me, and I see it as the answer to a lot of peoples problems both on a personal level and a collective one.  That’s how I mostly feel…at other times the whole thing seems ridiculous and absurd!  Not eat ANY cooked foods?  Not get drunk and stupid?  WHY?!?  What am I trying to prove? To whom?

As an example last night a guy at the bar wanted mashed potatoes.  We don’t have that on the menu, but Mike the Chef made some for him anyways, that’s the kind of old school cool we serve up.  When I bring him the potatoes I’m drooling.  When he adds a few dollops of real butter I’m butter.  So I try and remind myself that when I get home later I was actually going to make my own version of mashed “potatoes” which are made from soaked cashews and cauliflower blended up with salt & pepper.  They taste pretty good.  But they are NOT potatoes, and they are cold.  For some reason it just seemed stupid to me…am I too good for potatoes?

My intention with this blog is not necessarily to inspire anyone to do anything.  I simply want to reveal what eating raw is doing for me (now and in the future).  So please take what I say with a grain of pink Himalayan crystal salt.   I’m half-way through my trial and will continue to candidly share my peaks and valley floors with anyone interested…